Captain Novolin on SNES has one really unfortunate superpower
06.03.2024 - 09:37
/ destructoid.com
Look, my chums, it’s Raya Systems! They’re the ones who brought us Packy & Marlon and Rex Ronan: Experimental Surgeon; everyone’s favorite health-related edutainment games.
This time, I’m finally sticking a finger into Captain Novolin to check the temperature. Back in the youthful days of the internet, when making fun of bad video games was still considered a thing done by cool people, Captain Novolin was often a target of ridicule. I’ll admit that the concept is definitely a weird one, but I’d argue that Rex Ronan was much more fertile ground for jokes. Unless you like making fun of diabetics.
If you don’t know, Novolin is a brand of insulin. Captain Novolin is an edutainment game meant to teach diabetic children how to balance their diet, teach them about diabetes, and it also suggests exercise. This is back when people could actually afford insulin, obviously.
I personally don’t know a whole lot about diabetes, so definitely don’t take any medical or dietary advice from me. Most of what I know comes from Packy & Marlon and my first-aid training. As I’m sure is common, I know people with diabetes, but not in my immediate family. I have my own health-related issues, but nothing chronic that I know of. Unless you count my depression, anxiety, and debt.
But that’s what Captain Novolin is for: education. Except, it’s probably for people who have actually been diagnosed with diabetes. The first screen prompted me to “Enter the code your doctor said is best for you.” I don’t even know what that means. I didn’t realize that diabetic people use secret codes. Thankfully, it provides the helpful tip that “If you don’t know your code, use 000.” I was tempted to use the code 007, but I always listen to my doctor.
I think the number you put in might relate to the amount of insulin that the eponymous superhero administers to himself.
You play as the super-hero Captain Novolin, who has the superpower of… diabetes. I’m not saying someone with diabetes can’t be a super-hero, that’s ridiculous, but that’s literally all Captain Novolin has going for him aside from a speedboat and comfortable socks. He can’t even throw a punch, though that would be admittedly off-message here. I’m just finding out that he can stomp on enemies, which would have been good to know before I spent two hours just avoiding them.
The narrative has Mayor Gooden being captured by aliens and taken to the peak of Mt. Wayupthar. The aliens are disguised as junk food. I don’t have confidence in my own plans for municipal domination, but I’m not sure that dressing up as a sundae would improve my chances. They’re not even trying to tempt Captain Novolin to eat them and throw off his blood glucose level. They mostly just try to bump into him. Maybe